There is a lot of emphasis placed on self-care. You’ve probably read the tips and thought that would be nice to do, but it never seems to happen. Some of the common reasons you’re likely to use include lack of time, too tired or too many things to do. Although this may be true, there is more that lies below these reasons.
You probably grew up learning that women are responsible for caring for others whether that be children, family members, friends, etc. Caring for others, however, is not a simple task. It involves more than the so called “basics” or physical needs of providing food, clean clothes, and a safe environment. It also entails the emotional support of being there for the ups and downs of daily life. As you grew and matured, however, other responsibilities have been given or placed upon you. This may include working or building a career to provide financially for yourself and dependents. With all these responsibilities, you’re likely to find little-no time or energy left for yourself. So, like the women before us, you may have accepted this to be the norm. As a result, you do all the things expected of you and live a life of existence but not living a life. The more that you do for others the more acceptable it is by others as well as yourself. You lose yourself in the process and sacrifice self for the sake of others. Over time, you become not only exhausted, but also resentful to others for taking advantage of you. Unfortunately, you allowed them to do so. It’s likely that no one ever directly asked you to take on all the things that you have. You placed increased demands on yourself. May have done so because you felt obligated to do so or to prove to yourself, or others, that you could.
It’s now time to challenge this self-engrained belief! It’s no longer ok to accept this way of life and the daily practice of self- abuse. Being a good friend, daughter, wife and/or mother no longer means that their needs are more important than yours. When you don’t care for yourself, you are not the only one that suffers. You are harming all the other people you love in your life. How do you ask? By showing up tired, stressed and overwhelmed you are not able to be the best you possible. As a result, you make be short tempered, quick to respond without listening carefully and thinking ahead rather than being present in the moment. This is probably not how you want others to see you or how you want to interact with them.
So how are you going to start caring for yourself? Begin with one small step. Pick one thing that you want to do – maybe take 5 minutes out of the day to sit in silence, drink a glass of water instead of
another cup of coffee, stretch your body. Whatever it is just do it. It may seem silly or even insignificant to start, but it will make a difference. It will give you a chance to consciously do something for yourself, take a step back from the daily grind and change how you feel which will boost your mood. This is will reinforce your desire to continue and gradually add to this practice.
Remember, in order to be productive and be the best you possible, you need to take time to replenish yourself. You are the most important person in YOUR LIFE!
